Love, Love

I love love.

I love seeing people happy together && just living the life they dreamed of.

Happy

I still wonder when I will be able to experience it for myself…
Love that is..

And I am half hopeful that it might happen to me one day.

One day πŸ™ƒ

Today I had two different people ask me if I was really single.

Like yes. Yes I am.

I’ve been. For such a long time now.

But who knows if it really shows.

I’m so hopeful at times. I watched a video today about not being afraid to move on from a bad relationship.

I haven’t really experienced that…As it resulting in a break up.

But it made me smile. because that this girl found someone. Found love.

Years after it happened && she never gave up on finding her happiness.

I do believe that it comes when you least expect it.

But what do I know.

I just keep smiling πŸ™‚

Keep waiting 😍

Keep wishing πŸ₯°

Keep hoping ☺️

Stay happy ❀️

Stay true 😁

 

xoxoLaLa

Bring on the STORM!

Bring on the storm
Bring on the hurt
Bring on the pain
Bring on the sorrow

Let the tears stream down these cheeks upon your face
Let the words speak that have been hidden for so long

Release the anger that can no longer be built,
For it is ready to be torn down

Break down the walls that have held so much bullshit and lies
Break down the doors that have been blocked by knocks of anger

Destroy the hope that never was
Restore the heart that has fallen to pieces
Rebuild the life that has been lost

Release the suffering for one last cause
For it is time for you to rise

Bring on the smiles
Bring on the joy
Bring on the love that has been lost

Bring the heart that wishes to be mended
Spread the hope of one day feeling complete
Let out the tears of joy from releasement

For you have learned you are incredible

xoxoLaLa

Finding Strength

Struggling to keep my composure.
Struggling to not think about you, or anything that has to do with you.

It sucks, but it has to be done.

I don’t want to keep living this life for someone else that never cared.
I don’t want to keep living my life without you though.
I don’t want to keep living my life with you in my thoughts.
I don’t want to keep feeling the sadness that I once thought was all happiness.

I miss you,
I miss you more than you will ever know.

…………

A little bit of time has passed,
Time that I didn’t get to speak to you.
Time that I didn’t get to see you….
But
I had the chance,
I just opted not to.
I wanted to see if you would still be there if I took a step back.
I wanted to see if you really cared for me or at least thought about me.
But you didn’t.

What was I thinking?

This whole time I was blinded,
Blinded by hope and maybe even desperation.
I wanted you to want the same things that I did..
But I was wrong.

………..

It was a lie.
A lie in which I let go on for way too long.
A lie that would string me for years to come.

I was just happy with you.
Very happy.
The thought of you made my heart skip a beat.
(Even years later)
Every time I would see your name, I felt like I couldn’t breathe.
You made me the happiest I have ever been…
In such a long time.

IMG_2975

You made me smile from ear to ear, everyday for so long
I couldn’t wait to wake up the next morning to hear from you.

But we were never truly on the same page.

…………

Never let anyone be the reason to your happiness.
Include them.
Do not let them be the main reason.
Be happy.
Find you.
Who needs em?
Not you!

 

 

xoxoLaLa