Questioned

I know we are not together nor were we ever together or even be together for that matter.

So why am I here?
Why have I cared so much?
Why have I waited for you almost everyday just to hear something as simple as hi!?
You know the one thing that sucks the most is that being the kind of person that I am doesn’t get you anywhere!
Caring, loyal, honest, trustworthy etc… it’s all trash.. nothing but bullshit!
It’s all made up for people like me to be used && ignored and treated like nothing!

No feelings no emotions.
No nothing!

I don’t understand why it is so hard for me to let go.
Oh wait,
I know why..
…because I am me && I am not good enough for anyone.

Not worth anyone’s time… So why am I here?

Every time when I think something is going to get better it doesn’t, but why would it?
That would be way to easy.
There are times when I wish that I wasn’t the way that I am.
I guess I am a rare breed which only makes the most sense.
I’m not lucky enough to even feel happiness or feel like it is something to be worth being so different.
I rather not give a single fuck.
Like 99.8% of the world.
Unfortunately, there will be so many missed opportunities because my heart won’t let me leave the one that I really, really liked spending time with.
But that is just a memory now.
Left in the past..
Drifted away in the wind…

One that I don’t wish to read up on again because it would honestly hurt way too much.
I am at the point where I just want it to all go away.
I shouldn’t of been so blind for so long, because who knows, I could of been a lot happier by now….
But I am also afraid to write down certain things because they are the things that I don’t wish to remember or relive…
Where is that person who is suppose to tell me that everything is going to be alright!?

 

I guess that person doesn’t exist either.

xoxoLaLa

Breaking the Cycle

I’ve always had such a hard time.

Breaking the Cycle

It is an annoying habit to have, but sometimes you have to just bite the bullet && do what is best for you. Sometimes you have to go outside of your “mind” && look at things from a different perspective. I can tell you right now that it will in no means be easy but I can almost guarantee that it will be worth it && your happiness will be even greater!

I know I sound like someone that is being paid to say this but I always say things on my blog that I can speak from && have experienced for myself. I want to reach out to as many people as I can because I feel that it is important to know who you are && to never lose yourself. Your happiness is the most important thing in this world that belongs to you. Well… one of the most && you get to control that!

Do not let someone, take that happiness from you.
Do not let someone take what is not theirs.
Do not forget who you are && what you are worth.
Do not let someone control your anything.
Do not let someone waste your time.

It literally takes seconds… SECONDS to respond to someone. Whether it is through face to face, phone or text, hell even anything on social media. It takes seconds..

More && more I notice how much people suck.
This generation of people suck ass crack on a hot sunny day.. Eggs are fucking cooked to no end, just straight filth.
Obviously, I cannot speak for anyone else other than myself. So that is what I am doing..
That is what I always been doing && no this is not me going off on a limb && making up the craziest accusations… It is just me being me. 🙂

Anywaysssssssssssss

How many people can say that they have been left on read?
How many people can say that they have left someone on read?
How many people have said yes to both but only recognize one as being wrong?
…aka the first question…
There is this issue within this “era” where people feel the need to build someone up just to break them down && loose all hope in something.. Maybe not all the time, but I believe that there is some hurt to everyone at all expense.

What gets me is when I see someone post about how all females are the same && all they do is post pictures half naked for attention, where are all the real woman at?

I hate this.

Number one reason being is that 99% of the time (that’s just my exact guess from experience) there is at least one good person in the bunch that you know but ignore.

Male or female we have all done it.
So why do we look all over when there is someone right under our nose?
Is it for the likes?
Is it for the attention?
Well, hell maybe you aren’t into that said person, which is fine.

But people are so quick to jump on the bandwagon && continue to make this generation worst than what it was yesterday. I can’t tell someone how many times I have reached out to people just to generally see how they are && got nothing back. People are full of excuses && it’s absolutely sad.

But can we really blame them? It is all a vicious cycle that seems to have no real purpose && have no real end. There is nothing that seems to make sense anymore. There is nothing that can be said to break this cycle.

Nothing.

One day I think we will all come to the realization of how we have made this world a personal living hell. For either ourselves or someone else. Again with no real reason.

It kind of takes me back to the whole, “Is it for the likes? The attention?” Possibly.

I guess just grab a bag of popcorn && watch us all try to get out of this.

Get out of this nonsense && break the cycle, Together.

xoxoLaLa