Sometimes, if not most of the time,
I hate that I am reminded of how alone I really am.
(I know, I know, I’m always rambling on about the same old thing, cry me a river. blah blah blah bullshit)
But seriously..
Not having that support system when you need it the most sucks.
It’s like when you feel like the world is against you && your left feeling all alone.
No one seems to be able to help, && you think that they will never understand how you feel. && it kind of hurts at times.
You think that they have no idea how there are so many things that can destroy a person.
But they do..
To think that hmm, not even family members or close friends can help you,
or be there for you because it is simply not the same thing.
But it is.
Your problems are not theirs!
So they can’t relate, or just choose not too?
You are the controller of your life.
No one is put on this earth to fix you!
But that’s life. && that is how we can think at times.
There are feelings that we get && sometimes we feel like it is just ourselves against everyone else, even when they are on our side.
We shouldn’t think that way.
I say it is me, myself && I because it is a fact.
I have been alone for years && slowly I am adjusting to it more && more each day
&& looking at the reality of what my life has become so far.
People like to say that you don’t need anyone to be happy..
Which is true to an extent, I think, but it is not always just about finding someone to make you happy…
It runs much deeper than that, && that is the thing that a lot of people seem to misunderstand…
It is about the feelings, all of them, the good, the bad && the ugly.
It is about the emotions. the happiness && the sadness.
It is about the support system, the ones that go both ways.
It is about cherishing moments that you might not have thought would ever happen if you didn’t find this other soul to take that journey with you.
It is about building. It’s about learning. It’s about living.
It isn’t just something that you can buy at the store.
It is something that just runs through your veins when everything just feels oh so right..
It is the joy we all wish to discover one day.
The life we want to lead…
Maybe.
But until then, it is just
Me, myself && I
Until we meet.
Until the time is right.
There is no need to rush.
Just take your time.
*If it is you, who feels alone.
Just remember it is not permanent.
xoxoLaLa
